So today I got 7 miles in before my protein shake. But let me tell you the story of those miles.It was cold for Florida (53 with 10 mph winds) so that mean long sleeve shirt and compression tights. and Yes I wear shorts over them because nobody needs to see that. So I run a mile long sleeve comes off. I want to just toss it but don’t. Not because of littering or the plight of the homeless but because it’s a Batman shirt, I’d never forgive myself. I run to my gym 3.4 miles away I check in and decide to lift. After a few minutes I realize if I stay here I will walk home, NO BUENO. So I leave and start running home. I’m tired and hot now and want to shed these damn tights like Marilyn Manson circa 1994. I continue on telling myself “Just 2 1/2 more miles” “You could call an Uber” “I know I’ll flag down a police officer and explain i was mugged and need a ride home”. The cop would laugh and say “who would have the nerve to mug a dude like you?” I’d then explain how I was approached by a very aggressive group of grannies in an 87 Cadillac El Dorado Who threatened me with the dirty tennis balls that padded the feet of their walkers. In the end i just ran home. But these are the things I think when I run.
So how much does or a should a personal trainers physical appearance affect your decision to train with them. I am not an Adonis but I know what I am doing and how to get results. I am NOT a pretty boy nor would I ever want to be, I have lived the life of a fat man for 99% of my life. With that being said will any of that matter to my clients? Should it? Would you rather train with someone who can actually relate to your struggles. Or with someone who is pleasant to look at and won the genetic lottery. I’m not saying that the pre conceived notion of how a trainer looks is a bad thing. More so that pre conceived notions are a bad thing. If you saw my before and after (done solely by me) would you hire me? Replies are appreciated.
So I drove out to the woods today for a nice trail run. I went there knowing I’d left my trail shoes in the car. I however had forgotten that they were wet and in a bag. I opened the bag and a smell formed a visual hammer in the sky like in a cartoon and started assaulting me. They smelled bad rally fucking bad. I couldn’t even let myself wear them on the trails as I was afraid to get an instant infection and lose a digit. I wore my kinvara’s on the trails… not the same. Git the run in drove home with the windows down in my car because once the bag of stench was bothered it wouldn’t be contained. I got home and doused them in a combination of good old fashioned blue Dawn and white vinegar while standing in a pentacle reciting one of Bobby Singer’s incantations to send the Succubus back to where it came from. They are now basking in the Florida sun. Waiting….Watching… STINKING
Which means I got laid off today. I have spent six years working for a company with no loyalty. Today they proved it in spades. On the plus side I have been studying for my personal trainer certification. This just sped up the process. I left my former job and went straight to my gym. They are running a background check as I type this.So hopefully within a week my foot will be in the door and a few weeks later I’ll be doing what I actually want to do. I hope to help people who were like I was. People who have it in them they just need to find what “it” is.
So today I had one of the things runners especially trail runners dread…BUBBLE GUT.
Now it isn’t a rolled ankle or a shit your pants type scenario, that being said when every step you run feels like you could projectile vomit from a burp if you could only conjure one it isn’t fun. Other than that is was a nice 6.5 miles out on the trails in lovely Florida. Ran up on 6 deer always a cool experience. Oh yeah and trained a girl at the gym before my run…I think I killed her. How was your day?
I am just what the title suggests. I believe in no body shame, yet I don’t practice what I preach. As a former big guy I will never feel comfortable going shirtless and subject the general public to that. The few times I will:
1-Sexy time with my wife
2- The shower
I like most fat guy or former fat guys am far more likely to drop trow in public ( even if that isn’t impressive) than I am to show my gut and hairy man boobs to the world.
So today I went on a rum alone in the woods…. and i took my shirt off. It was kind of liberating yet extremely awkward.Would I offend the wildlife? What if I ran across a judgmental hobo? What would I do? Eventually I said fuck it and just ran. I know I will never be super comfortable shirtless no matter what shape I am in physically because emotionally I am damaged.